Saturday, March 20, 2010

Tin Foil Origins

The tin foil hat has a long and rich history which can be traced back to 1717 when Freemasonry began. Men that found themselves supicious of the Freemasons due to the extravagance and beauty of their hats soon began to grow very angry, one might even say mad, and set forth to form their own Fraternity. The 'Mad Hatters' as they called themselves soon discovered the protective properties of tin foil and found the Freemason's mind control devices could not penetrate their tin foiliness. Many problems raised that the Hatters had to overcome. The first of these being they were extremely easy to spot and due to this their means of recognition were quickly found out. The on going inner turmoil almost destroyed the Hatters. Eavesdroppers and thieves made quick work of the Hatters from the inside out. Only by the original founding fathers quick thinking were they saved. Tin Foil Hats with an outside coating of felt made to resemble top hats hid the sacred protection that was inside. The Non-Hatters were routed and the Fraternity was saved, for the moment.

The second tribulation of the Hatters were that tin foil is very lite and their hats, if caught in a stiff breeze, would blow off. Obviously if caught without their precious tin foil hat for a moment the Freemasons would immediately assume control of their minds and infiltrate the society. This problem was solved by the Hatters legendary ingenuity! If you lined the brim of the tin foil hat with mercury it made the hat heavy and no breeze could remove it! This made the Freemasons very concerned indeed. The Hatters were winning!

However, the adverse affects of mercury weren't then known and the Hatters soon began to lose their minds. The affects of this can still be seen today in what is left of the Hatter's Secret Society.

In summation the continued security of our society is guarded by these brave fellows. Wear your tin foil hat proud. Make it tall. We live in turbulent times my friends. May the hatters protect us all.

PS: Can anyone tell me what that is?